The topic today is abstinence. Its a concept hated by many in our modern culture, especially with the rise of many PUA groups on the web. For anyone unfamiliar, that stands for “Pick Up Artists”, and though they’ve existed throughout all time – they’re much worse nowadays. With the internet allowing them to group up and share their manipulative tactics, its no wonder abstinence is so disliked! Kids are being told on the internet and in our media – “You’re not a man unless you have sex!” – “Oh, you’ve never had sex before, you’re like a little girl, a child!”. Its peer pressure covered up by feigned shock. So to everyone out there who relies on those tactics – this article is not for you. This article is in defense of abstinence, from the perspective of its average supporter. Lets begin!
In my experience, there’s a correlation between atheism and promiscuity. If you only believe human beings are sacks of skin and muscle, then you would only view sex as the rubbing of skin. And if that’s your stance, there’s really no changing it. Some people simply reject spirituality, and that’s their own decision. Its their choice to disbelieve, just as it is my choice, to believe. To believe that sex is not simply the rubbing of skin, not simply a physical act, but a sacred and spiritual act as well.
In other words, your body is a temple, treasure it. You only get one body – and whether it be a gift from God or circumstance, you should value what was given to you. This temple of yours, should only be shared with the people you love – you know: My Body, My Choice. Just remember that when people try to shame you for your decisions. They disagree and say that sex is not a spiritual thing, but they are insecure in that belief. They’ve turned their temple into a public drinking fountain, and they won’t be content until you do the same.
Divorce and Sex
Countless university and privately funded studied across the globe have come to the same conclusion. There IS a correlation between premarital sex and divorce. Having sex before marriage, may increase your chance of divorce.
Now of course, people will get defensive and screech into the air “Correlation does not equal causation!” – good for you. Having taken an introductory to statistics course in high school, you now feel entitled to state truisms as though they are rebuttals. My question being – a rebuttal to what?
I personally, am not sure if premarital sex leads to divorce. But having come from a broken home of infidelity and alcoholism, I’d rather be cautious. If there is even a CHANCE, that something will ruin my life, I won’t do it. I’m 19 years old. I have not and will not drink a single drop of alcohol in my life. I don’t smoke. I don’t drink heavily caffinated beverages. I don’t do anything that may endanger my future.
“One puff won’t ruin your life man” – Probably, but if there’s even a 1% chance that it will, I’m not doing it! I’ve lived through that, and known people who’ve been consumed by their vices. I had eighteen years of that horror and I’ll tell you clearly – its hell on earth. Its the most terrible thing you can put anyone through, to tear a family apart. And although my critics will say I’m tainted from a bad childhood – I would say you’re too reckless and blinded by your prosperity. You see? We can both launch character attacks. And we can play that game of who had the worse childhood as well. That doesn’t change the fact that its my personal decision to make – and your preference for promiscuity does not make you my better. Also, call me a bigot – but I think a slut is more likely to cheat, than an abstinent wife.
Vices and Sex.
I think sex is a lot like coffee & alcohol – Your first time you may dislike it, or think its only okay. And next time you’re thinking “WOW THIS IS GREAT!”. And slowly it becomes that you cannot live without it! They can’t live without coffee! Can’t live without alcohol! They cannot live without sex.
When the online communities of involuntary celibates began rising, it didn’t surprise me in the slightest. It was the logical next step in this path of thought. When people refuse to acknowledge the destructive pull of a decision, they begin to rationalize it however they can. Its a dangerous train of thought. Rather than exercise some self control, people give in to their base desires and make up excuses afterwards. That slow descent from an enjoyable activity, to demanding it at all costs…
Until now, the incel community says that sex is a human right and must be given to them by the government. And on the flip side, women are trying to make men pay for their birth control. Why? Because Sex is a human right! So on one side, incels are demanding government money pay for men to be satisfied – while feminists demand government money pay for women to be satisfied. Rather than engage in self control, these people have become so twisted as to demand subsidies on lust. Regardless of personal responsibility! All they care about is sexual pleasure, and everything else comes second. THIS, is what happens when abstinence is put down.
Boys are told they aren’t real men until they have sex. Girls are given celebrity role models that flaunt their bodies for cash, teaching the next generation to value body over brains. And what is the end result? Both sides demanding government support of lust, as though that will bring them happiness.
This is why I normally hate the phrase “My Body, My Choice”. Because it leaves out the reality of the situation. Its your body, YOUR RESPONSIBILITY. You have the choice to be a slut or not, and you’re the only one who should have to pay for that. Why should I have to pay for YOUR CHOICE??? Unless you’re my daughter or wife, pay for itself yourself damn it! And if you can’t pay for it, that’s a sign you should not be doing it!
Buy whatever you want – its your life – just don’t use my money to pay for your mistakes.
Sex and Love.
I’ve had many male friends, I’ve had many female friends, and I’ve heard it a thousand times. From both sexes, it does not matter at all. I hear the same concerns from people in relationships:
Is he comparing you to this other woman?
Is she comparing you to past guys?
Is he long enough?
Are her breasts big enough?
What if they’re not satisfied? They might try to get it somewhere else…
Sex creates this aura of insecurity and mistrust that growing relationships DO NOT NEED. I’m thinking of a female friend in particular – who knew that her boyfriend had been around the block before. This guy who’s been with half the girls in town, who’s slept with ten other chicks! You’re the number one, right? This guy who’s been with more girls than he count but – he loves you for sure, right? He loves you and only you… But then, how many other girls has he said that to? “I love you” – how many times did he say it, before leaving them…
The stress it put on her ended with her breaking up with him. She simply, couldn’t relax with him. And I understand where she’s coming from! Just think the reverse! How many other GUYS has she said “I love you” to. When someone is confessing love to ten different people, then never seeing them again, it loses its meaning. Does that person even understand love? They just toss the word around like it has no meaning, I don’t want their love. I want the love of someone who treasures that word.
In my eyes, love should mean that you’ll be together forever, no turning back. There is no divorce, its not even an option. But love has become so devalued in our modern society, it practically means loving someone at one particular moment in time until you get bored and find someone new. Its the same reason I hate people who hug strangers – they devalue such gestures and language until it all becomes meaningless…
Think of a man-whore you know – Do those wedding vows really mean anything to him? And the exact same thought is why men are so reluctant to marry nowadays! That’s exactly why marriage is declining RAPIDLY in the USA! Because this girl you’re dating has been with 30 other guys – do wedding vows mean anything to her?
A vow is a formal promise, on your word, on your honor – And in the case of marriage, you vow your life to this person. You’re promising yourself and your LIFE to this other person. To devote your life to them, in sickness and in health – Until death.
Not until her boobs start sagging – not until his wallet dries up – Until death. You know why we say that, “Until Death”? Its because science and psychology has already proven that romantic love tends to die after a certain amount of years. Some say love dies after 2 years, some say its after 7 years.
Marriage – is saying “This isn’t romantic love alone – This is a lifelong partnership, a commitment of our souls, together forever”. Your wife should be your best friend! And for the ladies out there – your husband should be your best friend!
So I ask again. If someone has had sex with 40 people already – do you really think they understand that? My stance is, if you think sex is just skin rubbing together, you definitely won’t understand my views on marriage. You’ll think I’m being dramatic or something. And if you think that, why would I want to marry you?
You can learn a lot from someone’s opinions on sex. And I’d rather be with someone, who knows what it truly means.